I’ve noticed how easy it is to wait. For a better time, a clearer sign, the perfect push, being in the zone. Like most people, I’ve done it too—paused my life hoping for some external nudge to make the next move easier. Whether it’s leaving something that no longer fits—like the job that I wanted to leave, unlearning a habit that’s grown too familiar, or leaning into a version of myself I’m still getting to know.

And then, at some point, it hits—no one else can do this for me. Only I can help myself make a change.

That might sound a little harsh at first. But in reality, it’s powerful kind of freedom. Because if the key to change is already within you, then you are not stuck—you are right at the beginning.

Change Start With From Within

There’s a comforting lie I’ve told myself before: If things around me change, I would too. But there truth is, life doesn’t work like that. Circumstances evolve all the time. People shift. Plans changed. The only real constant I’ve found is how I choose to respond.

Change seems to begin in quiet moments—the kind where I admit, “This doesn’t feel right anymore.” Sometimes it’s a pattern. Sometimes a relationship. Sometimes just a version of myself I’ve outgrown. It’s deeply personal, the decision to pivot. Others might cheer me on, and I love them for that—but they can’t choose it for me.  Not in a lasting way.

The choice has to come from within.

Why I Stopped Waiting For Permission

I think many of us grow up looking for signs that it’s okay to take the next step—some form or approval or reassurance. Some kind of signal that we are not being reckless or selfish for wanting more peace, more clarity, or more alignment.

But waiting for permission can become a kind of stillness that keeps us stuck. Life doesn’t always offer dramatic sign. Sometimes, the most radical decisions are the quiet ones. The ones that don’t look like much from the outside but feel like everything on the inside.

What I’ve learned in the past is that:

You don’t need a crisis to change. 
You don’t need permission to grow. 
You can simply choose. 

Choosing to Be Responsible—for Myself

One of the hardest shifts I’ve had to make is this: learning that accountability isn’t about pressure from others—it’s about the promises I keep with myself. It’s easy to stay on track when someone’s watching. But what about when it’s just me, alone with my intentions?

That’s where things get real.

Internal accountability asks me to be honest with myself. To recognise when I’m avoiding something out of fear. To stop blaming the past for choices I’m making in the present. And no, that certainly doesn’t erase the impact of what I’ve been through. It just means I’m ready to move forward with awareness—not resentment.

And to be perfectly honest, this particular shift—that growth starts from within—is absolutely uncomfortable and it is strange at first. But it’s freeing.

I Thought I Had to Be Ready—But I just Had to Begin

There are a definite time I think I’m waiting to be “ready.” As if readiness is a perfect mindset, or a flawless plan, or even a new personality altogether. But most change doesn’t come like that. It shows up in messy, imperfect, stumbling steps.

I’ve learned that I don’t have to have it all figured out to begin. I just need to begin.

And yes, I’ll get it wrong. I’ll pause. I’ll question it. But I’ll keep showing up—not because I’m certain, but because I’m learning that showing up matters. Growth comes from commitment despite imperfection. From deciding, again and again, to keep going.

Letting Go of the Rescue Fantasy

I used to hope someone might see how hard it was for me and step in. Maybe they would fix it. Maybe they would show me the way. Maybe they would offer the kind of clarity I was struggling to find on my own.

But the older I get, the more I see: change that comes from the outside rarely sticks. Because when I don’t do the work myself—when I don’t earn the growth—I don’t own it. And when it isn’t mine, it never lasts.

The hard truth is also the empowering one:

Growth starts from within and I am my own rescue. 

That doesn’t mean I have to do it alone. But it does mean the first step. It has to be mine.

The Kindness That Fuels Change

Something I am still learning to keep in mind is that helping yourself doesn’t require harshness.

It’s easy to think that growth means pushing harder, demanding more, never letting yourself off the hook. But real, lasting change? It’s often rooted in self-compassion.

I still need to remind myself things like;

“This is tough, but I’m still making an effort.” Or, “I didn’t get it perfect today, but I’ll keep trying” and most importantly, “I deserve to feel better and to be kinder to myself.”

Self-kindness isn’t weakness. It’s what helps me keep going when perfectionism says I’ve failed.

No One Knows You Better Than You

I genuinely think that one of the most compelling reasons you can help yourself make a change is because no one knows your life the way you do. No one knows your private struggles, your mental roadblocks, your dreams that keep you awake at night. But yourself.

People can give advise, and some of it might be helpful. But no one else is living in your body, carrying your experiences, or walking through your day-to-day reality. Only you truly know what needs to change. Only you can feel when it’s time. Trust that inner knowing.

And if you are not sure yet? That’s okay. Sometimes the decision to change comes slowly. What matters is staying open to it, listening to the quiet—often ignored signs, and be willing to move when the moment arrives.

The Power to Begin Again

I have always told my friends and family that at the end of the day, you are the author of your own story. It’s not just a motivational quote—it’s a mindset shift. If you are feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or uninspired, remember that you can rewrite your direction. Not overnight, not perfectly but most importantly, steadily.

You don’t need to wait for permission. You don’t need to wait for someone else to carry you there. You have the power to begin again.

This doesn’t mean that I know exactly what the next chapter holds. But I know I get to shape it. I know I can revise. I know I can turn the page.

If you are feeling stuck, maybe this your reminder too:

You don’t need permission. You don’t need perfection. You just need a willingness to begin.

Real growth starts from within.