Every time someone mentions mindfulness, the first image that comes to mind is sitting quietly in the middle of a jungle, surrounded by the insects singing, without a single thought in my head. It’s serene, centered, and radiates an almost ethereal calm. I find myself wondering: how are we supposed to stay that calm in such a loud, busy world? How do we just switch off our thoughts? Maybe others imagine the same scene when they think about mindfulness. But for me, it feels wildly out of reach—because most days, my life looks nothing like that.

What I’ve come to realise is that mindfulness, despite what curated self-care routines and social media might suggest, it isn’t about achieving some flawless, unshakeable inner peace. It is not about floating above your emotions or eliminating stress. Mindfulness is about presence, not perfection—no matter what state you are in.

The Myth of Calm

It is easy to believe that if we are doing mindfulness “right”, we should feel calm all the time. That every stressful moment should be met with a peaceful exhale and smile. But the truth is mindfulness doesn’t eliminate discomfort—it invites us notice without judgement and with clarity often comes the question: What am I going to do about it?, How do I deal with it or move through it? 

When I realised that mindfulness isn’t about feeling perfectly calm. I used to think that if I still feel stressed or distracted, I had somehow failed at being mindful. But I’ve come to understand that mindfulness is about being aware of my present state—whatever that may be and without the need to erase it.

There are days, mindfulness is sitting with your racing thoughts without trying to shut them down. It is noticing that your jaw is clenched and choosing to soften it, even if the tension returns minutes later. It is meeting your own impatience with compassion rather than criticism. Mindfulness helps us to be with our reality—not escape it.

Presence Over Perfection

Have you ever sat down to meditate and found your brain shouting a thousand things at once? Same here. It is important to remind yourself that you are not broken. You are human and you are still practising mindfulness.

Mindfulness isn’t about the absence of thoughts—it is awareness of them. You can’t simply switch your mind off and that’s not the goal. It gently guides yourself back, over and over again, no matter how many times your focus drifts. That gentle return is the practice. That’s where growth happens.

The goal is not to have a blank mind. It is to notice what is happening within and around you, without needing to fix, control or resist.

Mindfulness in the Mess

Real mindfulness often looks a lot messier than we expect.

In my own daily life, mindfulness shows up in small, imperfect ways. When I’m working under pressure, I try to step away from my desk for a moment, take a few deep breaths, and bring myself back to the present. It is reminding myself that, while I take my work seriously, I also want to approach it from a more relaxed state—unclenching my jaw, slowing down, and softening my inner dialogue. Before I understood mindfulness better, these moments feel pointless. But now, I see how those tiny pauses help me stay grounded, even when everything feels urgent.

It’s pausing before reacting during an argument.
It’s breathing through the overwhelm instead of pretending it’s not there.
It’s giving yourself permission to slow down when your instinct is to power through.

And sometimes, it’s remembering that being mindful does not mean being calm—it means being honest to yourself.

Another thing I am slowly being to accept is that you can be mindful and still feel anxious. Your can be mindful and still feel sad, angry, tired, or uncertain. Mindfulness simply helps us hold space for them without letting them define us.

Accessible Moments of Mindfulness

I am no expert in mindfulness but, I try to practise it in small, a simple ways throughout my day such as:

• While washing dishes, focus on the temperature of the water, the feel of the plate in your hands.
• This is what often practice: during my work commute, I try to bring awareness to the rhythm of my breath, using that time to mentally prepare for the day ahead.
• In stressful moments, ask “what am I feeling right now?” and meet the answer with curiosity, not judgement.

These practices may seem small, but helps me staying connected—to myself, to the moment and to what really matters.

Final Thought

Mindfulness isn’t about having it all together. It is about noticing when you don’t and still showing up for yourself with softness. It’s about accepting that your mind will wander, your emotions will fluctuate, and your calm will come and go. But through it all, you can still choose to be mindful.

You don’t need to be perfectly calm to live intentionally. You just need to be present.